I guess lucky for me I was at the Improv last night instead of watching the game so I cannot really comment on it. Although I did a Reality and checked out the box score and pretty much got what I needed from that. The Lakers looked to shoot a low % and Suns rebounding/interior defense seemed to be on point. Not sure what woke Amare up, maybe it was my post!
They are done, like most of us figured they would be in the first round. They had a chance in game 1 and blew it. Since they were dominated in the important second game they more then likely will take one or two games then go fishing. They had a very very slim shot to beat PHX and if they didn't at least split a game on their floor they would all but finish themselves off.
SKCCCCCCRRRRRREEEEEEEECCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!Okay, boys and girls, now that the LA Lakers are all but out of the post season, it is time to dump the playoff posts and convert this board back to its summer playground status
OF:
HOW THE LAKERS TURN (my stomach), and other changes the team needs to make to once again revert all Laker posters into unbearable "Toady's for the
TEAM".
Number 1 - The Lakers clearly need to dump their coach and bring in a more experienced guy who can 'unite' these dysfunctional individuals. Someone who can control a clearly overemotional Kobe Bryant. Someone who can motivate Kwame Brown. Someone who can get more out of that lazy ass, Lamar Odom. Someone who can teach point guard technique to a non-point guard player such as Smush Parker. Someone who can translate dialogue exchanges between the Waltons. Someone like that guy who used to coach the ChiBulls back when that team was loaded with a bunch of dysfuntional bozos but somehow figured out how to win anyway.
Number 2 - Unload your superstar talent who can't lead the team without dominating games. Who needs a guy around who makes the rest of the team feel so inadequate and inferior? Just because the other guys are unable to shoot straight does not mean your "SS" should just take the ball right out of their hands -
IN PUBLIC!! - and virtually give you verbal instructions
DURING GAMES on how to hold the ball, demonstrate cross-over drives to the basket, and keeping your elbows in on jump shots. Could he not at least wait until time outs? What the Lakers need to do is draft a young, potential
NEW superstar, maybe right out of high school so he has not been corrupted by university level know-it-alls, and watch him blossom like a weed in a sidewalk amongst the drabble of the Forum.
Number 3 - Unceremoniously dump unproductive players, preferably on your unknowing rivals in the west. Trade the bastards if they can't win or demonstrate a desire to live, even. These guys are dead already and nobody has bothered to tell them. End the mystery for them and kill them now. Or trade them. Or catch and release them. But above all the Laker mystic
MUST - NOT - PERISH, because of crappy wannabees dominating the roster. Brown and Parker should be packaged to bring in LeBron James. Bynum and Walton will easily bring in Dirk. Trade your first round pick straight up with Memphis and draft Oden. Offer a million or two to sign up Nash and maybe that Marion guy from Phoenix. Its not like the Lakers haven't done this before.
Number 4 - Get rid of that worthless GM the Lakers are overpaying. Who created this fiasco in the first place? That's right - the GM's of all the other teams who took advantage of your mentally challenged and clearly handicapped guy your owner brought in to apparently meet some affirmative action hiring policy forced on him by state regulators. Now is the time to recitfy this nightmare. Lure Geoff Petrie away from the Kings by offering him a salary. He can then hire Joe Dumars from Detriot as his assistant. With these guys in charge, they will need to hire Bill Laimbeer just to beat down the hordes of superstar free agents trying break down the doors of the Laker offices to come to LA and play for them.
Finally, #5 - Move the team to Las Vegas. The team clearly needs to upgrade its starstudded fan base. Vegas show girls should replace the Laker Girls to bring some class to
THAT strip show. Offer some floor level seats to Wayne Newton and his entourage, and of course, to Charo. Go back to paying the fans in the cheap seats to raise their voices once in a while before a funeral breaks out.
All of this can easily be accomplished before the Mavericks drain their last championship three pointer this year.
Problems solved.