Author Topic: A parable for our times  (Read 1219 times)

Offline ziggy

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A parable for our times
« on: December 02, 2008, 02:23:41 PM »
A Japanese company ( Toyota ) and an American company (Ford Motor Co.) decided to have a canoe race on the Missouri River Both teams practiced long and hard to reach their peak performance before the race.

On the big day, the Japanese won by a mile.
The Americans, very discouraged and depressed, decided to investigate the reason for the crushing defeat. A management team made up of senior management was formed to investigate and recommend appropriate action.

Their conclusion was the Japanese had 8 people rowing and 1 person steering, while the American team had 7 people steering and 2 people rowing.

Feeling a deeper study was in order; American management hired a consulting company and paid them a large amount of money for a second opinion.

They advised, of course, that too many people were steering the boat, while not enough people were rowing.

Not sure of how to utilize that information, but wanting to prevent another loss to the Japanese, the rowing team's management structure was totally reorganized to 4 steering supervisors, 2 area steering superintendents and 1 assistant superintendent steering manager.

They also implemented a new performance system that would give the 2 people rowing the boat greater incentive to work harder. It was called the 'Rowing Team Quality First Program,' with meetings, dinners and free pens for the rowers. There was discussion of getting new paddles, canoes and other equipment, extra vacation days for practices and bonuses. The pension program was trimmed to 'equal the competition' and some of the resultant savings were channeled into morale boosting programs and teamwork posters.

The next year the Japanese won by two miles.

Humiliated, the American management laid-off one rower, halted development of a new canoe, sold all the paddles, and canceled all capital investments for new equipment. The money saved was distributed to the Senior Executives as bonuses.

The Senior Executives then went to Congress hat in hand asking for a bridge loan to help develop a better, leaner, and faster rowing team.  The Speaker of the House inquired why they needed a new bridge, when they could just take the boats to the other side of the river, and after much consternation on Capital Hill, they agreed and passed a bill for the bridge loan.

The next year, try as he might, the lone designated rower was unable to even finish the race (having no paddles,) so he was laid off for unacceptable performance, all canoe equipment was sold and the next year's racing team was out-sourced to India, and a new bridge, with Congressional financing finally in hand, was built connecting Alaska and Russia, while the Governor watched it go up right from her house.

Sadly, the End.
A third-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking with the majority. A second-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking with the minority. A first-rate mind is only happy when it is thinking.

A quotation is a handy thing to have about, saving one the trouble of thinking for oneself.

AA Mil

jemagee

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Re: A parable for our times
« Reply #1 on: December 02, 2008, 02:25:50 PM »
And much like the media and the folks on capital hill, this parable ignores the responsibility of unions in this whole disaster.

And it's definitely no modest proposal

Offline westkoast

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Re: A parable for our times
« Reply #2 on: December 02, 2008, 02:54:39 PM »
LOL I remember reading this joke a while ago.  Love how it is twice as funny now considering the Big Three Mess.
http://I-Really-Shouldn't-Put-A-Link-To-A-Blog-I-Dont-Even-Update.com

jemagee

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Re: A parable for our times
« Reply #3 on: December 02, 2008, 02:59:30 PM »
My favorite 'corporate' parable joke is entitled "How S**T happens"

Offline SPURSX3

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Re: A parable for our times
« Reply #4 on: December 02, 2008, 03:18:14 PM »
great read!
On the set of Walker Texas Ranger Chuck Norris brought a dying lamb back to life by nuzzling it with his beard. As the onlookers gathered, the lamb sprang to life. Chuck Norris then roundhouse kicked it, killing it instantly. The lesson? The good Chuck giveth, and the good Chuck, he taketh away.