For those "folks" about to enjoy the "dandy" ABC Prime Time #2 Kansas vs #3 Missouri, Brent Musburger usually is calling the biggest game for ABC, "pard-ner".
The Brent Musburger Drinking Game
WARNING! Play at your own risk. It is conceivable your whole party will be passed out with 8 minutes remaining in the first half.
*Note: Partner is spelled "Pardner," because that's the way Brent says it.
Rule #1: "The Pardner"
A person is picked to be the Pardner at the beginning of the game. The first time Brent says "Pardner," the Pardner has to take 1 drink, and then picks someone else to be the Pardner. The next time Brent says it, the new Pardner has to take 2 drinks, and then pick a new Pardner, and so on and so on. The Pardner must wear a special "Pardner" hat.
Rule #2: "Folks"
Everyone drinks 1 when Brent says "Folks." However, if Brent says "Hold on Folks", everyone must drink once but the first person to drink has to finish their drink for not holding on.
Rule #3: "It's a foot race!".
Whenever Brent says "It's a foot race" everyone has to finish their drink. The first one done becomes "That Man" and gets to punch the Pardner in the arm.
Rule #4: "There's that man again".
After someone becomes "That Man," they get to give away 3 drinks to someone of their choosing the next time Brent says "That Man." That person then becomes "That Man." If Brent says "That Man" before "It's a footrace," The Pardner becomes That Man. If The Pardner becomes That Man first, he gets to punch the new That Man in the arm twice after giving away the 3 drinks. There must also be a special hat for "That Man."
Rule #5: "Dr. Pepper". - (This works in bowl games; whichever food or drink is the title sponsor)
Every time Brent says "Dr. Pepper" everyone has to yell out "I'M A PEPPER!" and take 2 drinks. Afterwards, each person must give out a satisfied "AAAAAAAHHHHH!", as if in a Dr. Pepper commercial. Anyone who fails to do so must drink again.
Rule #6: "Jack Arute".
Whenever Brent says "Our ol' buddy Jack Arute" everyone has to say "AROOOOOOT!" Last one to do it has to do a shot. If everyone does it simultaneously, the Pardner must do a shot.
Rule #7: "In the college game".
Whenever Brent says this little gem, everyone must say "Shut the fuck up Brent", drink 2, and punch the Pardner in the arm.
Rule #8: Mentioning a Big 10 school during a game involving no Big 10 teams.
Whenever Brent does this, the first person who names the Big 10 school's mascot gets to make somebody drink for 11 seconds, since there's 11 schools in the Big 10.
Rule #9: Calling a touchdown before the player actually scores.
For example, during an interception return, Brent says "It's a touchdown!" before the player actually scores. In this case, everyone must start drinking and continue to drink until the player actually does score. If by some odd event, the player does NOT score, everyone must finish their drink.
Rule #10: "Kirk, my man".
Whenever Brent says "Kirk, my man", the Pardner gets to choose someone to be Kirk. From that point on, that person must be referred to as "Kirk, my man" until the game is over. "Kirk, my man" gets to give away 5 drinks the rest of the game any time Brent says "Kirk, my man". If someone talks to "Kirk, my man" without calling him that, they have to do a shot. If there is someone playing the game actually named Kirk, that person is automatically "Kirk, my man".
Rule #11: "The Major".
If Brent has a pet nickname for one of the players during the game, for example calling Major Applewhite "The Major", everyone must drink 5 anytime Brent uses this nickname. However, "Kirk, my man" does not drink but gets to give away 5 drinks since this person already has a nickname of their own.
Rule #12: "Matt Winer".
The first time Brent quips with Matt Winer, everyone must drink 1. The next time, everyone must drink 2, and so on and so on.
Rule #13: In the booth.
Whenever there's a camera shot of Brent in the booth, the Pardner must make a toast to Brent. After the toast, everyone must drink 1.
Rule #14: "My Friend".
Every Pardner gets to choose a "Friend." The friend must always get up to get the Pardner another drink (since the Pardner will be doing quite a bit of that). However, when Brent utters "My Friend" the friend gets to punch the Pardner in the arm for making him get up so much.
Rule #15: Reminiscing.
Everyone must take a drink everytime Musburger remininsces about former players... "And that play there folks reminds of THE BIG KAT... ANNNNDDDYYY KATZENMOYER"
Rule #16: Gambling.
Anytime Brent mentions the point spread or the Over/Under on the air (which all the Disney people hate), everyone takes a shot.
Rule #16: "LIVE".
Anytime Brent says "you are looking LIVE! at "x" Stadium" , or the like.... it's worth a shot.
Rule #17: YARD LINE.
You've got to add a rule about the use of the words "Yard Line." A run is never to, say, "The 30." It's always "The 30 YARD LINE." The Pardner gives away drinks to one person. If he screams it - no matter how unimpressive the play - double drinks for that person.
Rule #18: Time of Day.
Brent sometimes thinks he's a radio D.J. by the way he mentions the times of day. The Pardner gets to give out three drinks when he mentions something along the lines of - "we're all tied up here at the top of the hour..."
Rule #19: "OVER THE MIDDDDDLLEEEEEE"
Whenever a quarterback throws a slant pattern, you'll hear Brent say "Over the midddddlleeeee". When he does that on slants, or on any other plays, everyone takes a shot.
Rule #20: A penalty situation.
If a penalty flag flies and Brent says "Now hold on folks" ... yep... a shot for everyone.
